Pisces - Rooster: Easts meets West astrology

If you take the terms psychic, intuitive, prophetic and add creative and intensely imaginative, you find just some of the words describing Pisces, the twelfth House of the Western zodiac. The tendency of a Pisces is to work alone; they are capable of high intellectual achievement with a magnetic, mysterious personality. Sensitive, they are usually introverted, seeming constantly afloat inside their inventive mind.

If you take the descriptions flamboyant, well-dressed and groomed, always in the spotlight, you visit the world of those individuals born in the year of the Rooster. Center of attention? You bet.

Now, combine the pair. You think this bird is precariously standing on a lofty perch, and should take care? No, just look at the determined glint in this fellow’s eye. Don’t be fooled by those flashy feathers, arrogant stature and lofty attitude — this is a self-assured and courageous individual. Are the fish floating aimlessly with not a thought, maybe wondering what they are doing up here with this glorious bird? No, you have it all wrong! These are Rooster-fish who have no fear of flying, and are enjoying the strength and extroverted nature the Rooster personality brings to Pisces. They are completely free to enjoy their creative and intellectual pursuits, and willing to step into a well-earned spotlight, accepting their just rewards. Being warmhearted and caring, they now have the ability to give back to others their inventive gifts because of the brave, compassionate and strongly independent spirit supplied by the Rooster.

The flamboyant turns inward while the intuitive turns outward, and the benefit to others is the ingenious creations that result from this strong and powerfully talented individual, the Rooster-Pisces.

What kind of mother...

What kind of mother puts herself first?
A selfish mother is the worst.

It breaks my heart to see
Crack head mothers
Not just on TV
But in reality.

They say: my baby will save my life
Meanwhile they have nothing
No home or marriage
No man wants to call her his wife.

Is that what we are teaching our children.
To abandon moral & tradition
As if they never existed...
Life's wisdom, totally twisted.

So society foots the bill
For another new pill.
A baby is born addicted to drugs:
Never getting enough hugs.

What kind of woman makes this kind of decision
Fighting all logic & intuition
Knowing whats growing within
Was created in sin.

Im so afraid of being a mother one day
Not knowing how to act
Not knowing what to say
Keeping my spirituality in tact.

All we own is our beliefs
Our values and way of life.
I'd protect my babies
With all my might.

Teach them to be strong-
Know that they are loved
And they belong.

What kind of mother would
Teach their children to sing
Anything but a happy song?

Happy Independence Day!!! Heres to new beginnings

Today is the day, our country- the good ole U.S. of America celebrates her freedom. So many people have risked their lives for this great nation- today, many more risk their lives to come here for a "better" life- at what price?

Is it worth having all the things you desire when you are UNHAPPY...do you have to be so TOUGH & selfish to make something of yourself...whatever happened to kindness, honor, freedom, choice, the AMERICAN way?

God knows we are so lucky to be born here. Yes, I feel terrible for those who have to fight just to maintain basic rights- no matter where we come from, we ALL bleed...inside we are all the SAME> perhaps the plain Janes & party poopers had it right all along. Boring is better: its certainly safer.

Seriously, I dont wanna sound like a BROKEN record...

Is it really worth being beautiful, rich, successful, & intelligent? It seems like the faster we rise, the HARDER we fall...Im humble enough to admit, im far from all I aspire to be. I used to think a light shone around me- I still had an aura of innocence. Suddenly, the trials & tribulations of my past returned to haunt me. They were starting to harden my once sanguine spirit.

So many times this past couple of years, I looked in the mirror or caught my reflection...I had NO clue who this person was- this woman who became so driven for material things. I felt so much guilt. Not because of how I figured out to get what I want. The self loathing came from the fact I knew, I got lazy- I was taking the EASY way out- blaming my past pain for reasons to be irresponsible.

What past could a 27 year old have - a lost childhood. Sorrow. Confinement. Abuse. Abandonment...who am I to even complain- I was also given a very cooshy, safe home - two "stable" parents to replace the ones who created me. It seems that all that was never enough!!! Life has kept throwing more challenges.

I had counselors, therapists, doctors try to "evaluate" my personality. In many ways I grew tired of their repetitive questions...I had arrogantly assumed I knew more than them; outsmart intelligent minds. Now I see all that was an illusion- they saw right through the smoke & mirrors. In the end, who is the one who suffers?

Was it my lack there of- an emptiness & void that needed to be fulfilled...Its like a poison has taken over my true self- who injected me with this bitter contempt- I have no actual disease- perhaps a mood disorder nothing that any prescribed MAOI. cant cure!

Now, after all the drama- I want to change- I REALLY want to turn a NEW leaf- start over from scratch- get back to my ROOTS- school, family, a normal job- the whole nine-

I refuse to be one of those sad sorry TRAGIC women- I want to be STRONGER...less selfish, less foolish- the ego has to go- where did it even come from: this NEED to be recognized...for what? A sex object...drug addict... No. The intense creative energy has made me a bit of an eccentric with no sense of direction. The more it has been contained, the more I want to just throw it out there& not care what others think.

Life offers us so many chances. You can go to the TOP schools in the country. Come from the richest family. But who you are deep down reflects through the CHOICES we make...it get us nowhere to try to keep up with the "jones" when they are classless pigs- we should care about those who love us unconditionally. Our character is shown in how we treat our close friends & companions: the truth is, the people who defended me are also the ones who hurt me the most...

Its like, they want to keep me sick because if I actually get better I'll become independent & leave them behind. This will never happen. Its just their irrational fears that have frustrated my growth process.

And as much as I want to see the GOOD in everyone & lord knows, I put that extra KIND gesture towards all who cross my path- I have to OPEN my eyes & see the truth- this sheltered girl is a becoming a WISE woman- my good intentions have been perpetuated on the WRONG people. I see that now.

My "love" for humanity runs very deep- I was just never encourage to love MYSELF. Isn't that 4-letter-word over used: I say love often for lack of a better word to describe the intense emotions rushing through me from time to time.

For a moment, I thought of going back to dancing in "another" club. Cheeky. Now I see how that is also an unwise decision. If only I had loved myself sooner instead of beating myself up inside for accepting abuse- I always believed I deserved it. It ate me up inside ti discover none of it was my fault really, just a victim of circumstance. But acknowledging this epiphany leads to deep truths that can never changed...only accepted.

In many ways, I feel all these experiences make me a better person. Perhaps if Im luck enough to have children myself, I can teach them how to be even better people- that is my wish..until then I choose not to bring another life into this world of confusion. Thats just selfish.

IRONICALLY it was not traveling the world that taught me life's harshest lessons...all I had to do was step right outside my own doorstep. Now the healing can begin=)

All the best. Peace & love. Crystal xoxo

*Inspiring poem by Maya Angelou*

I KNOW WHY THE CAGED BIRD SINGS

A free bird leaps on the back of the wind
and floats downstream till the current ends
and dips his wing in the orange suns rays and dares to claim the sky.

But a bird that stalks down his narrow cage
can seldom see through his bars of rage
his wings are clipped and his feet are tied so he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings with a fearful trill
of things unknown but longed for still
and his tune is heard on the distant hill
for the caged bird sings of freedom.

The free bird thinks of another breeze
and the trade winds soft through the sighing trees
and the fat worms waiting on a dawn-bright lawn and he names the sky his own.

But a caged bird stands on the grave of dreams
his shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
his wings are clipped and his feet are tied so he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings with a fearful trill
of things unknown but longed for still
and his tune is heard on the distant hill
for the caged bird sings of freedom.

Older man & younger woman - is it true love or love for all the wrong reasons?

This is a shallow world. Thats NO secret. When we see a man 20 years older than his "girlfriend" we assume- he's using her for sex & she just wants his money. Does society have the right to determine our happiness?

Did anyone ever think that they had a genuine connection? They could really be in love?

Its hard enough trying to fit someone into our specialized lifestyles between work, family, education, friends, and self- there are so many conflicts, however, when 2 people happen to meet & feel that bond, jealousy, envy, and insecurities of others are projected on a couple that simply want to care for one another WITHOUT being judged.

Its unfortunate for those who have not had a tender, sweet relationship with the opposite sex. Our differences are the attraction factor- men & women do think differently on a primal level- we teach one another basic things that we cannot learn from the same sex.

With age. Somebody older or young can open our eyes to different experiences our peers may not comprehend.

To me, the age difference, if both can overcome the social taboo, its truly a pure & beautiful union. Is it really any body's business how 2 seemingly different people came together...in truth, the reason they are together & you are not is because they found a deeper connection beyond material possessions: they found value in the qualities within each other. Thats the treasure most of us never find.

I give couples who step outside the box of "society' so much credit- its brave & shows personal character... This kind of courage comes with age. When I was 20, i didn't quite have the life experience to tell people to F*k themselves when I had a 50 year old man in my life who I cared for .

We had a relationship that defied logic- I was only 10 years older than his oldest daughter but I was completely legal, just months shy of my 21st birthday...I was in between boyfriends. In the end, it was my own brother who ruined my romance. He really like my more age appropriate man who was only 5 years older.

What did we see in each other? He was my opposite in many ways- very respectable, stable, devoted. His daughter liked me a lot. I worked for his nephew who also became a good friend. I met his sister from Israel & nephew who worked for Apple...it was a safe environment- we just fit.

It was not about sex or money- we had long telephone conversations. Went shopping. Had dinner out like any other couple- he provided me with a sense of protection- that which my own father never gave me. He always said if I was not married by 30, he would marry me=)

He inspired me. Taught me a new level of intimacy. I guess I made him feel admired & kept youth & innocence into his life-

I know it was not my imagination. I went back with my ex then a few years later we reconnected once again.... but it just wasn't the same.

There is so much more words can never quantify. Im not sure where he is now or if he is still alive. I know, looking back that I loved him plain & simple....I hope he felt the same way.

ME & my ex Joseph (who I chose to stay with) are still good friends after 7 years. He was my first love after all. But during dinner one night, after too many sangrias, I told him my connection with the "other" man was profound- I know this hurt him as much today as it did 6 years ago when he felt I betrayed him.
Of course life is full of choices.


Do you believe every moment returns again in time? I do. We keep learning the same lessons over again until we learn- it just its you- THIS is the path, Im meant to take. But there is a part of me who will always be the hopeless romantic & wanderer...

One of my favorite SHAKESPEARE quotes:

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts.

New York City Dating Scene...oooooh...please dont take this blog too seriously...

Life is a huge farce, and the advantage of possessing a sense of humour is that it enables one to defy fate with mocking laughter.


Forget an "Ivy league" education... I went to the school of LIFE...I always write from personal experience. Before I was 8 years old I had lived in at least 10 different states including the US virgin islands. One summer, as a teen, an innocent trip to visit my birth parents in Oregon turned out to be the second time they would try to kidnap me- when I was 20, I dated a guy 30 years older & the chemistry was EXPLOSIVE- thats as far as I'll go- READ the BOOK. Coming sometime this decade=)

Now, at the tender age of 27, I'm going back to university in August to continue my higher education- all info Im providing is part truth & part humor- please don't take offense: we all have to learn to laugh at ourselves. Enjoy.

Dating in this city is TOUGH. Unless you are from New York, Manhattan or the outer boroughs: Im a Queens gal myself=) I never cared much for guys in Whitestone, where I grew up. In my teenage years, I ventured on the #7 train to times square, where I discovered older men with jobs, guys from Spain, Canada- I learned there is a bigger world out there than the town you live. It can be intimidating- Im just highlighting the WORST out there- the players, jerks, and losers.

To be completely honest, there are "good" guys in New York. Unfortunately nice & cute doesn't cut it in this city...
The options for women in 2008:

1- The out of town, ivy league educated wanna be yuppie from a small town: he might be cute, sweet, intelligent but he is preppy & needs LOTS of training. He might be an intern or new hire at a big firm. "Mommy & daddy's" money got him far- it helped him pay for his loft aka bachelor pad on Wall street- he might be a genuinely nice guy but ZERO personality and/or life experience- he's good for an older woman who doesn't mind a little fun in bed + is turned on by INEXPERIENCE.

2- The middle aged Millionaire: He's self made. successful, charming, intelligent guy who seems to have it all- the business(s), the apartment(s), the passion- he is never boring. He wines & dines you & he is pretty hot in bed- the first time you meet he touches you, you melt....he gets you in bed & hes still Mr. Wonderful...suddenly you're moving in- going on mini vacations to the Bahamas, meeting his friends (not his family, yet....). Quickies sessions in the bathroom. Could life get any better...

Ok, this man might seem perfect. Its a front. This doe not make him a bad person because he will never commit- to you or any other fabulous woman. In fact, he would not know how to recognize the perfect woman if her lips were in between his legs - to his benefit, he never makes promises. he lets you know he cares about you but want to keep options open. If hes a decent person, he will be upfront.

Just remember: you cannot change him no matter what you do or say- dont take him on as a charity case thinking you're that one woman in 40 years who will make him commit 100%

3. The promoter- he gets you into all the parties & life is fun, exciting, sexy- you're never bored- neither are the other 100 women he is sleeping with/flirting with/promising he will introduce her to so & so & make her into a STAR...whatever you do~ don't sleep with him: he will still get you into parties- jut learn how to be a master FLIRT...trust me, its not worth getting an STD just to skip the line into a club- there will always be another club & another sleezy promoter trying to f'k you.

4. The European- hes got the accent, fashion sense, romance- he's just oozes sex appeal & he wants YOU....think twice- he want to get you in bed & he knows its easy- all he has to do is TALK. Unless he takes you to dinner & NOT straight to his apartment- again, just keep it light....give him a pair of your underwear- European men love that! On the plus side, they are much more open minded about social taboos- if you're a free spirit, this man might be your perfect match- just dont expect him to be available when you need a real connection...he just wants you for your body.

5. The douche bag- hes broke, drug dealer, coke head, toy boy (in his mind)...whats wrong with this guy? Everything: he never has enough money, sex is unsatisfying Unless he has a big d*ck, there is nothing this guy has that women would want...to any rational, smart woman at least, yet he still has a way of justifying his bad attitude + behavior. Unfortunately women fall for him & he gets them evicted or thrown in jail- there isn't much to add here but please STAY AWAY - he is made for that lonely desperate middle aged woman or the young pretty one who is impressed by his ability to weave words around her pretty head...beware.

6. The trust fund baby (boy). He cannot do anything spontaneous unless he calls the lawyer who is holding on to his money for decades- his bank account may NEVER run out,but your patience will. He is spoiled & used to getting his way ALL the time. When you tell him you have to work, hes confused. He probably is emotionally & sexually attached to you if he even considers you his girlfriend- ultimately he will end up with another trust fund baby or he will still date you & take "Victoria" to the Hamptons instead so you can slave over your ordinary office job while he parties his life away. The benefit is, you get to fly out Europe during christmas & bbqs all summer long at his multi milion dollar vacations homes: which he inherited.

7. Mr. Merrily Married- He's so happy- he's got the career, kids, & perfect Trophy wife and to top it off with a big juicy cherry....he's got you ~ young, hot, just a phone call away- its a fun & spontaneous union from the START- sex in 5 star hotels- sex in the elevator- he treats you to room service in the morning- you can check out at your leisure- the problem is: he's NOT there when you wake up- he went back to his "normal" life.

This man leads a double life of sorts- by DAY he's a savvy lawyer, devoted DAD, hospitable hubby- but he is BORED...he needs excitement, variety- hes got some extra cash so he can afford the fancy hotels & a lovely lady to wine & dine when he feels his real life is caving in- besides he wasn't a bachelor too long ago- he may promise you: I will leave my wife...He WONT.
After months, possibly years of JERKING you around he suddenly has an EPIPHANY ~ Really I love my family- how could I disappoint my parents or separate MY children from their mother...at this point you're so in love with his SORRY ass.

Remember, you're not in love with him- as strange as i seems- meeting up at hotels for steamy 2AM trysts doesn't = an actual relationship. He may have opened up about his rough childhood or how he cant stand his wife's mother- that is just a moment of vulnerability- men have them too & later on, after the passion & lust dies, he will regret ever telling you these things. So do yourself a favor & don't get emotionally attached to this man.

Great sex NEVER = love.

The men mentioned above are just some I've come across or heard horror stories about from other women in NYC.

Have you ever met any of these guys or a combo...this is what I have found in New York, luckily, Im sticking with my British boyfriend- contrary to appearance, I believe whole heartedly he's one of my soul mates- we just go that "connection": whats 3500 miles + the great Atlantic Ocean-

“Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person.”

the prospects are scary out there. besides I quite like being "taken".

The SEAL of SOLOMON: If you dont believe in Religion or astrology Beware....

Sir Winston Churchill:
Truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it and ignorance may deride it, but, in the end, there it is.



Its a little known fact that The 3 Wise men were Astrologers/Astronomers who predicted that "Baby Jesus" would be born when Saturn "conjuncts" Jupiter in Pisces.

The planets would also make a configuration we know today as: The Star of David

If you understand astrology configurations- Trines, for example which is basically 3 planets connected by 120 degrees. A grand trine is 3 planets in the same element such as Air, Fire, Earth, or Water.

A kite is an "extension" of the grand trine with a mini triangle connected to the bottom- 3 planets (90 degrees apart) form a sextile aspect- the pinacle of this triange opposes a planet in the trine - it actually looks like a kite which is how it was named.

The "Seal of Solomon" is similar to THE STAR of david - yet its enclosed in a circle (like a natal chart) and specifically Air & Fire respectfully.

Jesus was also supposedly born in March, Christmas used to be celebrated in March- during the time of pisces- this is why the "fish" is the symbol of jesus:



Please read my next blog explaining how this is connected to me...Thank you for reading this far. Crystal xoxo

Relationship Advice: What does it mean when a man tells YOU- "Im busy"

Excuses, excuses, excuses....

Whatever you do, DON'T nag him!!!

I'm busy means either: 1- He's busy: But seriously, is he the PRESIDENT???

2- He's TOO busy for you = He's not interested in you. Hey, at least he took time out of his "busy" schedule to RESPOND...if he IGNORES you all together ~ FORGET him=)

3- He is already taken- emotionally/physically: men can get "emotionally" attached to a woman as much as we do- the difference is- men are not comfortable feeling vulnerable..in rare cases, they PUSH a woman away to avoid getting too attached.

If a man has a "regular" lady but doesn't want to LOSE you- he will never talk about the other woman & make you feel like the only one so he can keep his options open...remember that 2 can play that game..if you're not getting the attention you deserve, get smart & find a man who wants you in his WORLD not just hanging around in his life.

Honey, trust me, I know, its easier said than done. Especially if the sex was very good...it was probably even BETTER for him. So why doesn't he take the time to get to know you better- the REAL you. The INNER you & NOT just your body?

For starters, if he is a busy successful guy- work is his PRIORITY. On the other hand, when he has a couple days of "down time" he has most likely have a bevy of beauties stored in his BLACKBERRY.

YOu might be ONE on his list but NOT #1.

So to protect your heart, do yourself a favor...keep your options open- have fun. If there was a real connection- he will miss you & maybe give in to am ACTUAL date instead of a booty call- this takes lots of time & patience on YOUR part.

I made this mistake many times & pushed the relationship fell steam ahead, not knowing what I REALLY wanted then when he wanted me, I backed off- its a game that can become draining, confusing, & boring- if the challenge gets PLAYED OUT...there comes a point when you want the game to STOP.

If he really cares & respects you he will find a way to let you know- he won't F*ck with your head. And most of all, he will make TIME for you because he knows what a wonderful woman he has waiting in the wings.

NOTE: Don't wait around for a man. always have your own interests- pick up a hobby- learn to enjoy your own company- make new girl friends- anything to distract from a guy- Its the HARDEST thing in the world to accomplish.

Men have a STRONG needy radar, I have learned- MOST of them sense any sign of weakness, they RUN for the hills- then they come back around when THEY need you- its up to you to decide if this is the kind of man you want.

Men who play these kinds of games usually did not have a nurturing relationship from their parents, particularly their MOTHER. I believe the parent of the "opposite sex" determines how we treat our significant others as adults- assuming you are heterosexual.

Men who have not MATURED EMOTIONALLY will keep reliving the relationship they had with their parent(s) until someone they really fall in love with points it out or they decide to change themselves because they are tired of being frustrated & lonely in intimate relationships.

If you have any once of self respect- stand up for yourself. The best thing to do with this kind of CONFUSING & HURTFUL treatment is walk away. Anyone with a conscious given time will see they were WRONG. I've been told by exes who I left that I was the best girlfriend they ever had bc I learned NOT to take their shit!!! Ladies, the longer you stay with a B*stard, the less he will RESPECT you. Believe it...

Break ups are never pleasant. Still, I walked away & never looked back, they still try to contact me via email or telephone- although I've changed my number more than shoes...Im harder to reach than secret service!

Men ALWAYS remember the "one that got away" ~ they usually think fondly of the good times- most dont really appreciate that YOU stood by him through the bad times b/c he felt UNWORTHY of love so he turns his own self loathing onto his "partner". Its NOT fair. Its the TRUTH: when you don't love yourself, you cannot love anybody else.

There are only so many emotional hooks we can use before we run out. If we don't learn to communicate better with the opposite sex, breakups & divorce rates will keep growing ~ families will broken. And children will grow up to be the inconsiderate a**holes who complain about today.

Practice Kindness, forgiveness, patience, & understanding - nurture your current relationship instead of having one foot out the door- something Im guilty of...

I guess if you have found your SOUL MATE- then give it all you got ladies. However, if he's just a jerk who has no RESPECT for you & your emotions, then walk away...and NEVER look back.

(I give the same advice to Women, we still have a long way to go too.)

Peace & Love,

Crystal xoxo