We REAP what we sow.
DO we really KNOW?
At the TIME, the consequences
of our ACTIONS seem trivial.
Only looking BACK can we see
What we did was pivotal
In who we ARE today.
When we lack SPIRITUAL knowledge
and grounding
We live LIFE our OWN way.
EGO & WILL control our every move.
When I said: I'll NEVER make my mother's mistakes -
What was I TRYING to PROVE?
When my daughter was born
The FUTURE seemed brighter.
There was HOPE.
Slowly it began to SLIP.
Melt away:
like soap on a ROPE
It is over a year later.
There are still times
when I falter.
There are still FEELINGS
Left unsaid.
Habits that I wish were dead.
Yet, although I am very much alive
My SOUL is yearning to STRIVE:
To find some sort of MEANING.
The PURPOSE of MY existence
On the bosom of my being
Cannot be denied
While grasping for food
There a MIGHTY will to SURVIVE.
I NOW understand the TRUE
Meaning of LOVE.
Even the days when I am BLUE.
Heaven seems to open up ABOVE.
In the DARKNESS
A light seems to SHINE
ASKING me... how PRECIOUS
IS your TIME?
Now, I finally see
Filtering through a sea
of UNCERTAINTY.
Perhaps I already HAVE made
HER mistakes
And that is OK.
Life is not ALWAYS black & white.
There are SOME shades of GREY.
You do not have to be anyone but
WHO you were meant to be.
YOU are allowed to make mistakes.
Find MIRACLES in LUCKY breaks.
Acknowledge suffering as PART of this
Experience.
Never REGRET your first KISS.
Even MOTHERS are only flesh & bone.
I have forgiven her lapse in judgment
We even talk on the phone.
Although she has never met her grand daughter.
That is alright.
At least, I have come to this Poignant point:
When I rest my head to sleep at NIGHT
I'm letting go of this FIGHT.
X O X O
